Recently while listening to a podcast of the large, on-campus, Bible study at Texas A&M University called Breakaway, I have been given many things to thing about. One of which is where my heart is. What in my life defines who I am.
One question Ben Stuart, the director of Breakaway asked, was does our lifestyle reflect what we love? Many of us as American college students say we are christians and believe in God. But when you start asking us how we spend our time, what we buy and where our money goes, it does not line up with what we say.
I was extremely convicted by this and so I started wondering, would my answer be any different than of those around me? Today, with extreme certainty looking back on the last few days I can say yes, my answer is different. In the last week, I have bought blankets, sheets, mattress toppers, Bibles, and coffee creamer. All items to be given away in a little over a week when I am back in Alaska.
Outside of those items I have bought items to fulfill my basic needs. Food, shampoo, toothpaste, gas, things along those lines. All things necessary for my life, but very little outside of that. Yes I went out to eat, but every time it was to spend more quality time with friends, building relationships with those around me.
But any other day of the year would my answer still match what I say? I don't know. The last week of my life has been spent preparing for the time when I get back on the airplane to head North. I have talked with people I am beyond blessed to know to get their advice on how to effectively serve while I am in Alaska. I have spent money purchasing items to take with us to further the ministry we are working with.
Yesterday was a highlight for me. Spending time comparing prices, totaling weights and pursuing what is most needed in Nome. An entire afternoon with awesome friends finding exactly what we could take with us. It was a great day. A day where I knew that what I had done that day had a purpose. It would impact eternity.
Those are the days I live for. But when I am struggling with school, having trouble finding the motivation to keep going and do everything for the glory of God, those days are tough.
While right now I can confidently say I am living to serve God. But I can also confidently say that it is not the same answer every other day of the year. It is still a struggle to wake up and be fully committed to what God is doing every minute of every day. But it is a battle worth fighting. Because by doing so, not only am I guaranteed to win, I am guaranteed to help others along the way.
